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Climate Crazies Now Say Netflix Causes Climate Change

by Jeff Dunetz

Netflix makes me laugh…literally. Their comedy specials are wonderful. Just in the past few months, they’ve featured comedy from some of my favorites such as Gabriel Iglesias and Jeff Dunham. Apparently, the supporters of the climate change hypothesis are jealous of the streaming service because they released something almost as funny as a comedian on Netflix. They are complaining that watching Netflix (or porn) releases CO2 into the atmosphere and causes Climate Change

Per Maxime Efoui-Hess, which is associated with the French think tank The Shift Project: “Watching a half-hour show leads to emissions of up to 1.6 kilograms of carbon dioxide.” That’s the equivalent of driving 3.9 miles.

Last year, online video streaming services produced carbon emissions equal to the size of Spain, and that amount may double, according to Efoui-Hess.

Trending: Steve Scalise And Jim Jordan Rip Adam Schiff’s Kangaroo Court

While 34 percent of online traffic comes from streaming videos on Netflix, Amazon Prime and Hulu (amongst others), the next biggest group is online porn.

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That’s right, America. First, they wanted to take away the fossil fuels that heat your house and the electricity that runs our air conditioners and enable our cars to move.  Then they want us to stop eating steak because cows fart and want Americans to stop traveling by airplane (don’t they know it’s a long walk to Tipperary, wherever that is). The climate crazies also want to destroy the economy with their Green New Deal, which would have no effect on climate.  Their panic over an unproven hypothesis means we’ll be stuck in our houses that will be freezing during the winter and boiling hot during the summer because even if we have jobs, we couldn’t get to them anyway because we have no cars.

With all this misery created because of an unproven theory, climate crazies want to rip away our laughter by telling us not to stream NetFlix.   And don’t ask me about the porn (unless we are talking off-line). The Shift Project is a French think tank…I thought the French loved porn almost as much as they enjoy surrendering. Heck, France is famous for selling “French postcards” pictures of nude women.

Per the NY Post, streaming services already growing are about to take a great leap forward

Meanwhile, Netflix boasted a 53 percent increase in international revenue from 2017 to 2018, and new highly anticipated streaming services are coming, including Disney+ and Apple TV+.

Then there’s the issue of ever-increasing screen size and quality, which takes even more energy to power. The Consumer Technology Association found that the average screen size in 1997 was just 22 inches. By 2021, they predict the average television size to be 50 inches. Popular 4K resolution screens use about 30 percent more energy than the high-definition screens that preceded it. Soon, powerful 8K resolution screens, which debuted last year, may become an industry standard.

I do not anticipate, however, that the Disney+ service will have adult movies, so don’t count on seeing “Snow White, One Girl’s Search For Sexual Pleasure With Seven Little People,” anytime soon.

Here’s the real solution.  Until science proves that climate change is genuine by looking at the environment instead of flawed computer models that have been wrong in the vast majority of their predictions or explain why the Earth hasn’t warmed since Bubba Clinton was president…


…I am going to keep on streaming Netflix comedy specials, keep the temperature in my house at a pleasant 68-70 degrees, drive my car all over the place, travel to other countries by air, and eat nice juicy Kosher steaks.

There is something positive about this latest example of Climate Change fear-mongering.  It becomes #66 on the list of the stupid things climate change fearmongers say caused, or was caused by climate change.

“The Official Lid List Of Stupid Things Fearmongers have said about Climate Change:”

          1. Arab spring
          2. Incredible shrinking sheep,
          3. Destruction of Afghan poppies 
          4. Invasion of jellyfish in the Mediterranean
          5. A surge in fatal shark attacks
          6. Boy Scout tornado deaths,
          7. Severe acne
          8. Global conflict,
          9. Beer tasting bad
          10. Better Beer
          11. The suicide of farmers in Australia,
          12. End of the American Dream
          13. Bigger tuna fish,
          14. Fish shrinkage
          15. Longer days,
          16. Shorter days,
          17. The collapse of gingerbread houses in Sweden,
          18. Cow infertility,
          19. UFO sightings in the UK,
          20. Shortage of Hookers in the UK
          21. A rise in insurance premiums,
          22. Heroin addiction
          23. Bear attacks in Japan 
          24. Frigid Cold Winters in Great Britain
          25. Cancer
          26. Death from heart disease, diabetes, stroke, respiratory disease, and even accidents,
          27. Homicide, suicide
          28. Coffee from Uganda
          29. Doggie Depression
          30. Waterborne disease outbreaks
          31. Bad relations with Russia 
          32. A decline of Circumcision in Africa
          33. Heavier, wetter snowstorms treacherous for travel and ambulation, 
          34. Lyme disease, swarms of allergy-inducing, stinging insects, along with mosquitoes and devastating pine bark beetle infestations and the spread of forest and crop pests  
          35. Tigers eating people 
          36. Fewer geese
          37. 40,000 dead crabs
          38. Shorter, higher-pitched frog mating calls in the Middle East.
          39. Screwed-up love-making,
          40. The Japanese earthquake-tsunami,
          41. A horrible rash of tornadoes in the southeast United States,
          42. Extended  severe allergy seasons, Lyme disease, malaria or dengue fever, trauma, depression, high blood pressure, and heart disease,
          43. Eye Disorders.
          44. An Increased threat of wars, violence, and military action against the UK. 
          45. Migration of possibly rabid Vampire bats from Mexico, 
          46. Extreme weather, disappearing islands and less productive workdays
          47. Giant Snakes
          48. Armed robbery, prostitution, and drug abuse in Ghana will make you go nuts,
          49. The rise of terrorist group Boko Haram 
          50. Caused the Seychelles snail to go extinct it’s alive and well), 
          51. Rock Snot
          52. Increase anxiety, fear, and depression
          53. Expensive Olives
          54. Cannibals 
          55. No more red-haired people, women will become pear-shaped, incontinent, impotent bald guys with extra hair growing from his toes. 
          56. Global Cooling
          57. The sinking of the Titanic 
          58. Illegal Immigration  
          59. Prostitution
          60. ISIS 
          61. Walrus “Convention” 
          62. Shrinking Goats
          63. Diabetes
          64. Brexit
          65. It will make us crazy
          66. Netflix