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Climate change will make your plane late, imprison you at home, buckle roads, boil asphalt

It’s the end of the world, and kittens will probably die too. Here’s another round of Global Panic.

Horror part I: you will get stuck at airport-world

Earlier this week, nearly 50 flights out of Phoenix were cancelled. At 120 degrees, the temperature forecast exceeded the airline’s 118 degrees maximum operating temperature.

It’s difficult not to connect the delays to climate change….

It’s difficult not to blame climate change, after a generation of brainwashing.

So Phoenix got to 48.9C which made it nearly as hot as Marble Bar, Australia, last year (when it was 49C). After 80 years of deadly global warming both towns were nearly as hot as Marble Bar was in 1922.

As the world continues to warm, such plane delays will become more common, says Camilo Mora, an associate geography professor at the University of Hawaii at Manoa. And that’s just the beginning.

And imagine what associate professors of geology might forecast on flight patterns circa 2080? You’ll never know if you read Fortune, where anyone can forecast climate bad-news, but prize-winning atmospheric scientists remain invisible if they stick to things they know, like the failure rate of climate models.

Horror part II: You will spend all summer locked indoors and You Might Die

According to a study co-authored by Mora, if carbon emissions aren’t reduced, by 2100 New York City will experience about 50 days per year of heat and humidity conditions that has resulted in death (up from about two days now).

Meanwhile, in cities such as Orlando and Houston, this threshold will be crossed for the entire summer, making it unsafe to go outside for extended periods of time.

“We’ll become prisoners of our houses,” says Mora.

Mora is doing what he was paid to do. Apparently his role is to take predictions from broken climate models, extrapolate that failure for decades, and turn that bad news into a press release.  What almost no one is paid to do is check the assumptions on failing GCM’s or find natural causes of climate change. Thus proving that evolution works in science funding, grants support research that supports more grants.

Horror part III: Power failures will kill you

Unlike the other predictions, this one may actually happen, but the deadly force is renewable subsidies:

Power outages, like the one that swept through Northeast and the Midwest in 2003 — leaving 50 million people without electricity—will no longer be an inconvenience, but a national emergency.

Horror Part IV: Roads and train tracks will melt and buckle under the heat.

Like chocolate, asphalt can grow mushy under the blazing sun. As the temperatures becomes more extreme in the summers, highways will “start to melt,” says Mora.

Do people in the US not know that asphalt and bitumen go soft in the high 40s? Did we need a study to see that?

Fortune subscribers like to hear that other people are more stupid than they are?

The Global Smugness is strong with Laura Entis and Assoc Prof Mona:

Unfortunately, as a species, “we suffer from short-term memory,” he says. When, earlier this week, a heat wave hit the Southwestern states, climate change was in the news. But “next week, when the heat wave is gone, everyone will be talking about something else.”

Instead of putting your head in the sand, Mora urges action, even if it’s minor: “consume less,” he says. Try to drive less, turn down your thermostat, or reduce your meat intake.

Why would people pay to be told they have memory loss, are short term, probably mentally deficient, selfish sods with their heads in the sand? Surely this patronizing preachy dictat is not written to convince the unwashed masses. So who wants to buy this –  could it be the patsies who think that eating Tofu, catching a bus, and staying cold at home will help to improve the weather for their children’s children? Could be. People who hold those improbable notions might enjoy hearing how stupid everyone else is. This is self-congratulation as form of subscription driver.